The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn’t talking to me.
Tag: short
Whats orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
How do you make a net?
Sew a bunch of holes together.
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Step Ladder
This is my step ladder. I never knew my real ladder.
I bought the worlds worst thesaurus last week. Not only is it terrible, but it is terrible.
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Colorblind
I just found out I’m colorblind! The diagnosis came completely out of the purple.
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Rorschach Test
How come when i google image search “rorschach test”, i just see 40 images of my parents fighting?
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Humans and Bullet
What’s the difference between humans and a bullet?
Humans miss John Lennon
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Whorehouse
What do you call children born in whorehouses?
Brothel sprouts.
I tried to share a bag of chips with a homeless person on the street.
He told me to fuck off and buy my own chips.