A guy walks into a bar and says to the bartender “O-o-one b-b-beer, p-please.”
The bartender tells him, “I used to have a stutter too. Then one day, my wife gave me head, and from that point on I was cured!” The guy gets really excited and runs out the door without ever getting his beer.
The next day, the guy walks back into the bar and says, “O-o-one b-b-beer, p-please.” The bartender asks him, “It didn’t work, huh?” The guy says, “N-n-nope. B-but y-your h-h-house is r-r-really n-n-nice.”
A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, “I’ve had enough and have left you. Don’t bother coming after me.” Then she hid under the bed to see his reaction.
After a short while, the husband comes home and she could hear him in the kitchen before he comes into the bedroom.
She could see him walk towards the dresser and pick up the note.
After a few minutes, he wrote something on it before picking up the phone and calling someone.
“She’s finally gone…yeah I know, about bloody time, I’m coming to see you, put on that sexy French nightie.
I love you…can’t wait to see you…we’ll do all the naughty things you like.”
He hung up, grabbed his keys and left.
She heard the car drive off as she came out from under the bed.
Seething with rage and with tears in her eyes she grabbed the note to see what he wrote…
“I can see your feet. We’re outta bread: be back in five minutes.”
Something was missing from the Sex Panther. One of the reasons you know it works is because of the bits of real panther. My Sex Panther has no real bits. My friend suggested a way to ameriolate that and as soon as he said it, I was all in!
Internet to the rescue! I ordered a bag of panther teeth from the internet. Then I modified one to act as a tip for my toggle switch.
I wanted a way to thread the tooth onto the switch. I had to make a threaded insert for the tooth with an M4 thread. Home Depot does not carry M5 threaded inserts for panther teeth so I had to make one.
I started with the smallest brass nut I could find. Then I drilled out the hole in the nut until I got to 3.3mm and used an M4 tap to cut new threads. Then I filed the nut down until it was round and the outside was 1/4″ diameter.
I drilled a hole in the tooth to accept the post from the toggle switch. Then I drilled a 1/4″ counter bore to accept the threaded insert. I had to orient the insert in the tooth so the tooth would point down. Then I glued the insert into the tooth with CA glue.
After the glue dried I filed the sharp corners, sanded, and polished the tooth. It looks super awesome!
Now that the finish is done on the body and neck, it’s time to assemble. Holes are drilled in the control plate, pots and a 3-way toggle installed, strings, solder, and away we go!
The guitar is cool as shit! It’s super light, but not neckdivey (even with locking tuners). The whole look is awesome with the pink black and wood. I’m suuuuuuuuuler happy with it.
I did install a Floyd rose style string retainer bar. It really gets a good break angle for the strings.
There is one more surprise thing to do before it’s complete.
Any music fan that is my age probably remembers the movie Crossroads. The movie was largely forgettable except for the climatic guitar battle between Ralph Macchio’s character and the devil’s guitar player played by Steve Vai (see below).
Last summer I read a copy of a guitar magazine that tracked down info on Steve Vai’s red guitar. Here is a link to the article. This is a neat read. Fans of guitars will recognize the headstock shape as a Jackson and apparently it was made by Grover Jackson himself. The guitar was one of Steve Vai’s actual guitars (before the invention of the Ibanez Jem)
I came across the scene today again and looked on the internet for some info on the guitar battle. Apparently the guy who did the music for the movie (Arlen Roth) is a bad ass blues player. The guy who played Ralph Macchio’s part of the guitar battle (Ry Cooder) was originally supposed to be the “bad guy” instead of Steve Vai. The original battle was supposed to be a blue on blues battle. Arlen Roth actually released a recording of the original guitar battle recording on Soundcloud and it’s cool.
I’m at the point where final polishing starts, and parts start to go on. Now is the most convenient time to check things out and give myself one more opportunity for surgery.
The neck required some tweaking because of the finish. I had to sand off some of it at the heel so it fit the pocket good. Also a couple of the tuner holes needed opening up (also because of the clear coat).
Everything else fit good, and it gave me the opportunity to see the overall look.
Yeah, that’s a cool fucking guitar.
Now it’s time to polish. The headstock and neck should be pretty easy, but the fretboard will be a PITA.
While texting with my friend, I came up with a way to describe the “vibe” I am going for.
I think if I said that, you could pick this guitar out of a lineup.
2 hours later…. I needed to do a couple things.
The hole for the neck pickup wire was a bit weird. The wire kept interfering with the plate for the pickup. I had to lower the opening for the wire so it could stay under the pickup.
This neck has a truss rod adjustment wheel in the heel area. When I put the wheel on, it wouldn’t fit. I had to open the area up a bit and took the opportunity to paint everything black.
I’m finishing the neck with nitrocellulose lacquer. This is an old school clear coat that gets hard and can be polished real smooth and shiny. It also feels good for a neck.
This finish is built up using multiple layers so they can be sanded level and then polished. To save time and material, it’s good to make the wood as smooth as possibly blue before the lacquer. For this, I’m using an epoxy product.
The headstock face is going to be black with a car ol sticker. I’ll prolly use polyurethane to finish the sticker (it builds up faster, cures faster, and dries harder).
First step after sanding is to fill the pores in the grain. I’m using Epoxy for this which is a thing 2 part epoxy that is easy to work. You basically mix it up, smear it on with a spatula and scrape as much off as you can. Then some sanding and reapply a second coat.
I decided I wanted to have the neck a darker color so I stained it with some minwax stain from the hardware store. It looks awesome!
Next I will spray a couple coats of gloss polyurethane on the headstock to give the decal a good smooth place to stick. Then I will start to spray the nitrocellulose lacquer on the neck and fretboard.
I’ll put some more coats on the neck and then let it harden a couple weeks.
Now time for the headstock! The sticker is applied to the clear coat from a while back. Then spray a bunch of clear on top to “bury” the sticker. I’m aiming for enough clear to completely cover the sticker and make the whole thing level and smooth.
Now about 10 billion more coats of clear and let it harden for a week or so.
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