Categories
Jokes

Skinny Dipping

A priest and a rabbi are some nny dipping. All of the sudden, two busses pull up. Out of one pours the rabbi‘s congregation and out of the other pours the priest’s congregation.

Their clothes are on the other side of the lake, so they don’t have time to retrieve them. Both decide to just make a run for it.

The priest, running with his hands covering his genitals looks over and sees the rabbi running with his hands over his face. He says, “Rabbi! What are you doing?”

The rabbi says, “In my community, they recognize me by my face.”

Categories
Workbench

Cutting and Planing Lumber for the Top

The top of my workbench is made from 5 foot long 2x4s. I need to cut my 10 footers in half. I also want to practice cutting nice with a hand saw.

I need something to push against, so I used my holdfasts to attach a baton to the bench. This give s me something to stabilise the work while I cut it.

Baton for crosscutting

I marked out the cut lines with a square and a knife and used a chisel to make a notch to guide my saw. Paul Sellers calls this a “knife wall” and it makes it super easy to keep the saw straight and gives nice cuts.

I cut all my boards down and did a nice job.

Nice cuts

Now for the planing…

I needed way to hold the work while I planed and I don’t have a vise. Luckily it’s all figured out centuries ago.

I’m not sure what it’s called but I screwed an angled block to the face of my bench that traps the wood against my bench. I added some pegs to support the bottom and the system works perfect!

Angled block
Work supported for edge planing

I need to plane the faces too, and need a way to hold the work. 3 small pegs arranged like an L in the top of my workbench work beautifully.

Planning stops
Planning stops
Surface plane

A sharp plane is fun to use. It makes some beautiful curls of thin wood and leaves a really nice surface.

Curl from edge planing
Planed surface
Categories
Workbench

Workbench Inception

It sure would be easier to make a workbench if I had a workbench. Lucky for me, I had a big ass hunk of butcher block counter top.

I screwed some lumber to the wall with masonry screws and attached the counter to it. I added some legs and a 2×6 to the front and voila!

Helper workbench

I also added some holes for a pair of holdfasts. It’s solid as shit, too bad it’s attached to the wall.

Categories
Jokes

Farmer Interview

A reportedlr is interviewing a dairy Farmer about his

Interviewer: How much water do they drink a day?

Farmer: Which one? The Black one or the brown one?

Interviewer: Brown one.

Farmer: A couple of litres per day.

Interviewer: And the black one?

Farmer: A couple of litres per day.

Interviewer: I see. What do you give them to eat?

Farmer: Which one? Black or brown?

Interviewer: Black one.

Farmer: It eats grass.

Interviewer: And the other one?

Farmer: Grass.

Interviewer: Why do you keep asking which one when the answers are the same?

Farmer: Because the black one’s mine.

Interviewer: Oh, and the brown one?

Farmer: It’s also mine.

Categories
Workbench

Workbench

I’ve always been interested in woodworking, I just never had the equipment and space. I always thought you need table saw, jointer, surface planner, routers and gobs of other expensive machines to do it.

A while back I found the YouTube channel of a guy named Paul Sellers. Paul is an old school furniture maker and does so using primary I’ll hand tools. Now he runs a woodworking school and publishes books and tons of social media content (blogs, and videos). His series of videos on making a joiners mallet inspired me to give it a shot. I borrowed a couple hand planes from my dad, and bought a cheap set of chisels from Harbor Freight and went to town.

I quickly found out if I want to do stuff like this, I need a workbench much better than my little Black and Decker workmate.

I decided to build a Roubo style workbench. I was going to make it out of cheap framing lumber, and I was going to do it with mostly hand tools.

Fast forward to now. I have a pile of lumber in my basement, and cleaned out a corner.